With all of the issues you've had using the activehybrid 8P, have you considered simply changing to the proven N57 8HP70? Sure it would be a bit of sunk cost, but with a pretty much guarantee to work since it's been done a number of times.
I'm a manual trans guy myself, but I will say that the e-manual would be a great compromise.
I''ve also been through hell with a GM 6L80E and if I have another issue I'll be putting an n63 8HP into my Escalade
