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      12-01-2015, 05:08 AM   #1
335i nthehouse
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Very, very OT, non motoring venting of spleen.

.........<telephone rings>

I get up from table working at home to a tight deadline, a touch stressed. Answer the phone:

(Automated message) "Are nuisance calls driving you crazy on your telephone <casual laugh> - I bet I know the answer. We have the solution ........"

(Me): "Are you taking the absolute fucking piss, fuck off!"

Can anyone else see the irony of this particular nuisance call.

Twats.

#excusethecolourfullanguage
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      12-01-2015, 05:17 AM   #2
creepy coupe
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They have been driving be nut lately. I've jsut signed up the TPS. I hadn't realised you could for mobil phones. They have all but stopped now.
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      12-01-2015, 05:26 AM   #3
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We ask the fuckers to hold on a minute & see how long they manage

Either that or just take the piss out of them & see how long they last before hanging up.
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      12-01-2015, 05:35 AM   #4
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The problem is they just hang up and it puts your number back into their system for another call.
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      12-01-2015, 06:09 AM   #5
335i nthehouse
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What's even sadder is this one was automated. I still lost my shit.
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      12-01-2015, 06:26 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 335i nthehouse View Post
Can anyone else see the irony of this particular nuisance call.
Nope, lost on me.
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      12-01-2015, 07:50 AM   #7
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If it's a woman i ask what knickers she has. If its a bloke i ask what knickers he has on. Both seem to work pretty well.

Id like to point out im only interested in womens kickers. The sniffing and wearing there of.
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      12-01-2015, 08:12 AM   #8
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I'll sometimes tell the wife its for her and dodge the daggers I get
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      12-01-2015, 08:39 AM   #9
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Are you going to try this one let's us know how you get on
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      12-01-2015, 08:45 AM   #10
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I just never answer the home phone. People know to leave a message and if I want to talk to them I'll call back
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      12-01-2015, 11:50 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 335i nthehouse View Post
.........<telephone rings>

I get up from table working at home to a tight deadline, a touch stressed. Answer the phone:

(Automated message) "Are nuisance calls driving you crazy on your telephone <casual laugh> - I bet I know the answer. We have the solution ........"

(Me): "Are you taking the absolute fucking piss, fuck off!"

Can anyone else see the irony of this particular nuisance call.

Twats.

#excusethecolourfullanguage
X Directory is the answer and I have and never had nuisance calls, May have to change your number though.
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      12-01-2015, 02:22 PM   #12
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Get one of the BT call minder phones, works a treat and I haven't had a cold call since I got it.
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      12-01-2015, 02:35 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by creepy coupe
They have been driving be nut lately. I've jsut signed up the TPS. I hadn't realised you could for mobil phones. They have all but stopped now.
Yup did this years ago and the mail one. Best move
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      12-01-2015, 02:55 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris The Manx View Post
Yup did this years ago and the mail one. Best move
Same here.

Although I do get the odd one.


Couple months ago I had one of those foreign 'have you been in an accident' ones.

So I answers the phone.

'Hello we hear you have been in accident'

Me - 'no I have not'

Them ' you had car accident'

Me - 'no I am only 16'

Them ' oh can I speak to parent'

Me ' they were killed in an accident when I was young'

Pause, pause...

Them ' Do you want to make a claim'....

Never miss a chance do they.
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      12-01-2015, 02:59 PM   #15
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Girl at work had a nuisance call. Usual Microsoft update type one. After the cutomary no thanks I don't even have a computer / Mac.......the agent told her that her house would be bombed in the next 20 minutes! Outrageous! As if Microsoft could coordinate anything in 20 minutes.
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      12-01-2015, 03:05 PM   #16
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Get quite a few of them at work

Throws them a bit when I then ask them if they've ever bought PPI .......
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      12-01-2015, 03:41 PM   #17
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Seriously waste their time then you get blacklisted and not called again.

Best not to answer by name and then when they ask say you'll just go get him and then just leave the phone on the side. You can make a game of how long they wait, usually it's less than 1m but my record so far is just over 5!
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      12-01-2015, 04:16 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arthur D View Post
I find that if you answer the telephone with "Hello, ISIS headquarters....." they don't bother you anymore.....
Then you get 'ah hello, do you know my son Muhammed, he went to fight there, he has a beard and wears black?'
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      12-01-2015, 04:18 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by davyk31 View Post
Get one of the BT call minder phones, works a treat and I haven't had a cold call since I got it.
Very good
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      12-01-2015, 04:25 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brigand View Post
Then you get 'ah hello, do you know my son Muhammed, he went to fight there, he has a beard and wears black?'
Then (seemingly) most people in the UK would go, "No way! My son's called Mohammed too".
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      11-16-2019, 04:04 AM   #21
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I must get around 5 a day!
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      11-16-2019, 04:11 AM   #22
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I must get around 5 a day!
5 what? threads dug out of the past?
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