[AlanQS]

“….. the earlier suggestions in 1993 concerning road pricing ran nicely into electronic tagging and pay as you speed ideas. This was reinforced by the insurance industry who wanted to avoid, or more importantly, identify, high risk drivers in an effort to pacify the mainstream motoring public who were fed up with sky high premiums and ever reducing service. The main effect of this disillusionment was a massive shift away from comprehensive to third party insurance which was crippling profits.

Allied to the electronic ‘here I am tags’ on Security vehicles an unholy alliance was formed among insurers, government, and the electronic industry and by 1994 the Bill was on the statute books. It took 15 years to develop the technology and infrastructure but finally, Electronic Data Logging and Capture (EDLC) units were required to be fitted to all new vehicles and, over a period, retrospectively fitted to cars up to three years old at the date of enactment . Naturally, in keeping with the total incompetence of the government to capitalise on any development, within six months, 90% of the EDLC units were being imported.

The law had been pushed through with some public reluctance but the stated advantages were ‘politically correct’ therefore not prone to public protest. Car theft would be massively reduced as a result of real time tracking (though owners of cars over four years old weren’t terribly happy as there cars now had ‘target’ signs invisibly painted on them.)

This would also reduce (for some), insurance premiums depending upon usage, time of day etc. but the real purpose behind all these changes …..” History of the Road, 3rd Edition, 2016

Tony shuffled out of his front door cautiously and sniffed the cold morning air. There was no traffic in the seedy street, only a group of boys walking in the distance, probably returning from a camera busting foray – though it was getting harder to do as the camera boxes were virtually indestructible and had long ago been made flameproof.

He went round the back of the old terrace to the dingy row of lock-ups. His looked as seedy as the rest but there was an 8cm thick steel door behind the up and over fascia and the inside walls were 10cm thick reinforced concrete, as was the roof. After all, his was the only lock up in the row which actually contained a car.

Working for the Forward Alliance insurance company allowed Tony to have a car at all. His job, catching existing car owners without EDLC units was essential in the eyes of his employers and the government which supported the insurers behind the scenes. His job would soon go as there were increasingly few hold outs left in the country, but he was one of the best, had been for three years and would keep his job to the end.

He drove out into the street, ignoring the jealous eyes behind neighbouring curtains and cruised down to the main junction. The speed panel was out at the junction again and failed to display his speed as he approached. It could show his registration, LA 91 CCG but the speed bar flashed, stating ‘speed excess - @ km.’ He ignored it and moved off.

“…. Although EDLC would make automatic cameras such as GATSO redundant the authorities decided to keep them as the system could be linked into the town centre CCTV systems (which were no longer just town centres). This was touted as permitting more control by less personnel and therefore more efficient, but the reality was even more control by more personnel. Joe Public was getting sewn up. As a corollary to this…..” History of the Road, 3rd Edition, 2016

Tony made it to his city centre office inside half an hour. It was a jam free day and the 10km journey had been uneventful. Turning into the office car park, the 14m high gates swung open, alerted by the EDLC unit in his car. The armed guards nodded to him briefly, keeping their eyes fixed on the open entrance the whole time. It was ironic he thought, that when car theft was virtually pointless, their destruction was likely if you parked in the street where the local aggressor gangs could easily get their hands on it, - and their axes, clubs, molotovs and, sometimes, semtex.

Once in he was called to the divisional director’s office. After the case of the Interlagos blue coupe a year before, he had been given the tricky jobs. Classic car owners tended to hide their cars if they were free thinking types. Too old to qualify automatically for EDLC when it first came out, and totally conspicuous if used much on the road, the freedom ‘junkies’ kept their untagged cars out of sight as much as possible. Of course, the penalty for tag evasion was now ‘retirement’ of the offending vehicle and a hefty fine.

The director told him that an overnight database sweep of the defunct DVLA computer had revealed the possible existence of a sapphire black coupe still owned by a man who lived about 15 klicks from the city centre.

As far as could be established, he was the original owner and owned it since 2007 and was a model from before the Daimler-Steyr –BMW conglomerate had been formed. They U.K. office could not confirm as pre-amalgamation records were scarce after the 2014 troubles. Tony’s job, to find the car if it still existed and retire it.

“…. Increasingly, normal crime rates were soaring as catching and convicting became more difficult. Motoring offences were much easier.

Ever increasing demands by the Home Office for higher numbers of convictions and by the Treasury for more money, allied to technological change, allowed the police to fulfil both requirements. Motorists were the easiest targets of course, and in direct contradiction to the reasoning behind electronic tagging, the motorways, already the safest in Europe, were blitzed. By late 2010, the proposal made in August 1993, to take the fines direct from the miscreant’s bank account, were enacted. The corollary of this was that only people who might have any money to take, were targeted. The majority of people using motorways during the day were people in employment, so they took the full brunt. Similarly, city centre CCTV targeted well dressed people for any minor infringement of ever growing regulations. Drunken louts infringing law abiding citizens rights by attack or abuse were seldom prosecuted as they didn’t have any money and prosecuting was time consuming and expensive. After a few years, the majority of ‘law abiding’ citizens had been up on charges…..” History of the Road, 3rd Edition, 2016

The Director continued with his briefing. It seemed that the police had very little information on the owner as he had been living abroad since 2010 and had but recently returned to the house he still owned. The man had however, ‘phoned the police several times about aggressor gangs and camera busting. It was obvious that he was not familiar with the changes to Britain in the 10 years he had been away.

That night, Tony found the house easily. It was in a better area of the town, a clean street, with one unvandalised camera box. Leaving the office had been more awkward. The guards had been watching a street rape and wouldn’t open the gates until it was finished. Tony passed the bloodied body of the victim on his way out. He wondered if the guards would call medical support. What the hell! The man shouldn’t have been walking alone in this area anyway.

A direct approach was usually the best with an unaware target. A DSB 150 was parked in the driveway. Impressive! Only back in the country a short while and already the target had a powerful 500cc car. His naivety was pretty apparent though. The car had no anti ram bars and Tony was willing to bet that the fry bars on the door handles were standard manufacturer 500 volts rather than 10,000 volt “burn ‘em” bars.

“…. Frying of the under secretary for transport. Of course, the situation did not remain static. The law abiding citizens finally realised that the lack of police response to real crime could work both ways. Whilst they were worth pursuing for their money, it still took police time and effort and in the meantime they tried to protect themselves against the lawless packs in their increasing numbers. House and car alarm systems were rapidly replaced by intruder injury devices. High voltages to car doors became standard offerings and traps at house doors and windows became common; often of the lethal variety. Household accidents rose dramatically but it wasn’t until the Heir to the Throne……” History of the Road, 3rd Edition, 2016


There was no sign of any other car but he could see the corner of a garage at the back of the house. With his insurance pass in his hand, he approached the front door.

The man who answered the door was in his early fifties. Not tall, but BIG. Tony waved his pass in the man’s face, said “Insurance Checker” and brushed past the man into the house.

Or rather, he tried to. He suddenly found himself dangling off the ground and being propelled backwards out the door he had tried to go through. The door slammed.

Tony picked himself up, apoplectic with rage and battered on the door. The door swung open violently and the man stood in his path smacking a baseball bat against his leg. “If you have any business here. you’ll conduct it with courtesy or not at all.” The door slammed again.

Having gone from purple with rage, to white with fear in a split second, Tony considered his position. If he called for reinforcements, bang would go his “rep”. The guy was not used to New Britain and knew nothing about the power of Insurance Checkers. Try the polite approach.

“I’m sorry to have kicked off on the wrong foot sir, our normal operating procedures got the better of my manners. Please forgive me but I have to speak to you in an official capacity.”

The man let him in. Tony asked if he had any other cars apart from the DSB 150, specifically, a black coupe.

“Under the 2012 Road Traffic Act, all cars are obliged to have EDLC units fitted, irrespective of age. According to our records you own a car which does not comply with the regulations and you must therefore pay the consequences of your action. Now, where is the car?”

“What regulations? What consequences? What’s going on?”

“Ignorance of the law, specifically the enabling 1994 act and subsequent amendments to the R.I.P Act in 2011, 2014, and 2016 are not considered valid defences sir. Nor is the fact that you have been out of the country since 2010” On that, Tony produced the warrant and gave it to the man.

The man stood still for a minute and with a huge sigh, led Tony through the back to the garage. He opened the door and Tony sucked in his breath. There it sat, gleaming in the soft light, a dinosaur of a car but reeking of power and purpose. It’s wheels dwarfed those of modern cars and it’s bonnet was half as long as an entire modern car. He was itching to drive it.

A closer inspection revealed the leather seats, the manual gear lever(!) and various buttons and gadgets he hadn’t the first idea about. The Stop/Start button seemed to entice him closer. He was dying to see under the bonnet as the briefing stated it had a massive twin turbo charger engine, but he could wait until he returned to the office.

The man started to speak; “I didn’t realise the full extent of the changes to the country. Before I went abroad I had seen the start of double speak, stealth taxes, restrictions on all sorts of things. It seems to have accelerated since then. These Acts you quote appear to be for the benefit of the state, not the public. The environment isn’t better, employment is at an all time low, and as for crime…! Huh, but then, I’m the criminal apparently.”

With a sigh, the man handed Tony a key.

“….. the benefits of the new Road Traffic Act and Public Order Act were slow to be perceived by the public. It appeared at first that the criminal classes benefited most from the new laws but as more ‘ordinary’ people were prosecuted it was seen that the majority of the population had become less law abiding and the new laws had been foresighted enough to foresee the need for a radical form of re-training.

Allied to this realisation was the improved understanding that the section of the community regarded as ‘real criminals’ were, in fact, people with medical and environmental problems who required help and treatment to enable them to benefit from our society. This concept was reinforced in late 2009 when an eminent judge slammed the ‘ so called’ victims because the way they behaved enticed these poor people to carry out an illegal act. It was just not fair that some people had nice clothes, cars, and cash in their pockets. It was their own fault if they were robbed.

Parliament recognised the real situation and, in 2013, passed an Act…..” History of the Road, 4th Edition, 2018

Muttering under his breath, “Orwell was right, he was just 30 odd years early”. The man slammed the door on Tony and leaned back in despair. He remembered Paul, and Carl, and Davy, the verts and estates, hammering up the autobahn at 160 in his delimited car, the ‘ring in May – aw crap! And he went upstairs unable to stop comparing his old car’s power in comparison with modern cars.

His wife looked up sadly when he went into the bedroom. “So Mark’s warning was right about the car?” He nodded. “I’m worried about the fine” she continued, “Mark says that it’s quite steep.” He smiled to himself as he heard the bark of his car engine, the screech of tyres as the yob left the house. “I’ve lost it, but there won’t be a fine. No car, no fine.”

Tony swore at the slide over-revving produced on this car – this thing took a bit of handling! He checked that his own car was secure and continued down the street. At the next junction he was amused when the Speed Panel remained blank at his passing. No watchful electronics! Analogue instruments! No tracker! He felt a temptation to sink back into the leather seat and put the boot down!

Back at the house, the man was now glad that Mark had mentioned some options before that slimy creep had turned up at his door. With his electronics experience and Mark’s military connections, the parts had been easy to make and install. He went down to the basement and pulled an innocent looking small box out of a drawer.

“Sadly public understanding of the new Acts took a significant time to develop though it has to be stressed that a maladjusted minority, particularly from the ‘professional classes’ caused more unrest and trouble than any other group. Only the far sightedness of the government in setting up the Information Ministry in 2007 and then the General Publications Board in 2012 has led to a proper understanding by the vast majority of the population. Indeed, tribute paid to it at the Ringleaders’ trial of 2013……” History of the Road, 4th Edition, 2018

Tony reached the on ramp and booted it down the slip road, totally ignoring the 70km speed signs. After all, there were no routine cop patrols and cameras didn’t recognise the car. He looked out the car window as the road streamed by. He glanced at the speedo, only 70! Shit. Then he laughed as he realised it was reading miles per hour. He was actually doing over 110!

He accelerated some more, the needle crept up to 90. He was really enjoying this. Gradually he became totally wrapped up in the driving, the sensation of speed, the roar of the engine. Barely slowing, he exited the motorway leading to the last short back road to the office, 5 klicks of winding road which had now dried in the freshening breeze.

At first Tony took the corners carefully but after a few good turns he started opening the car up as he approached Arson End, a tight left then right hander. He was doing 60 – no that was a ton, aw what the hell as he came to the first bend. Leaves were scattered across the road and sheltered by a rock outcropping, were still wet. The back end kicked out and he realised the car was sliding but had no experience in what to do. So he did all the wrong things. The car spun and Tony picked out the anticipated point of contact with the rock wall at the side of the road.

Miraculously, the car came to a stop in the middle of the road facing in the opposite direction. Tony sat there a moment, panting and sweating. He gingerly started the car and turned it round. He had paid scant attention to the car’s power and had nearly paid for the mistake. Not again!

Just at that moment, the man pressed the button on the side of the innocent looking box. Simultaneously, there was a small ‘whoof’ under the bonnet. But Tony didn’t hear it. A small hole appeared in the side of the brake cylinder and fluid started to leak out. No warning light appeared on the dash.

As Tony reached the last turn before the road to his office, he grinned with elation. This would be a big score for him. Then he considered the office approach. At this time of night there would be aggressor gangs on the street and without an EDLC on the car, the gates wouldn’t open as he approached them. He would contact the guards, let them know he was coming and, to avoid aggressor missiles of all kinds, would race up to the gates quickly as they started to open, do a 90 degree turn whilst slowing quickly and slalom through the opening gates.

Having done so, he surveyed the street leading to the gates. A small group were huddled in the darkness opposite the gate and seemed to be inactive.

He accelerated up to the gates, slammed on the brakes and chucked the car sideways. At that instant, two things happened. One, the brakes completely failed, and two, a rear spring, unused for a decade and abused by Tony’s driving antics, snapped. The car bounced off a kerb at the side of the gate and flipped into the air, rolling once and landing right way up about 100 metres from the gates.

Tony groaned and shook his head. Four of the airbags had gone off, protecting him quite well from the roll-over. Suddenly he heard a shuffling and murmuring from behind the car. Tony turned his head to seek the source of the noise and his eyes widened. At the same moment the gang had concluded the same as Tony. A car this old had no fry bars and with a shriek, the aggressor gang attacked the car from every angle. There was movement at the gates. A head looked round the edge and quickly withdrew. Tony was dragged from the car, screaming. The screaming halted as the opportunity was taken to pour petrol down his open mouth and round his head. Tony was kicked hard, by many feet. Petrol was poured on the car. The guards suddenly came out of a side gate, firing their weapons at the group clustered round the car. A match flared in the night followed by the thump of a bullet hitting soft flesh. They held Tony up in front of them. Just then a bullet hit him in the shoulder, spinning him round to face his attackers. He screamed, his fume laden breath fell on the sputtering match, igniting with the match’s last dying ember.

Tony’s breath flamed like an old time fire eater and scorched the face of the nearest aggressor who fell back, screaming. With a sussurating sigh, the flame travelled along the breath, down Tony’s throat and ignited his insides and his petrol soaked face. Burning inside and out, Tony collapsed, his mind already gone with fear, his body soon to follow in the flame.

His falling body collapsed against the petrol soaked car and ignited. Within seconds the car’s tank went up with a loud bang taking two more aggressors and a guard with it. The stench of cooked meat was overwhelming. Guards and aggressors retreated, leaving the field to the car, the dead, and the dying.

“ Preface to the Book

This brand new publication by the General Publication Board (and with grateful acknowledgement to the Information Ministry) is the first ever definitive History of the Road in this country. From the start of the travel age it covers the kind of transport used on the roads from the early steam and petrol cars through the crazy years either side of the millennium and onwards to the present day.

In particular, it details, as never before, the curing of the national malaise that led the Technical and Professional groups to think they were the powerhouse of the country. Read about the stirring exploits of brave Law Enforcers supported by determined government to change that era of defiance and chaos. Read about the way it was done from that stirring first step in 1994 all the way to today’s much better times.

Thrill at the triumph of the government’s altruism over the business man’s cynicism! Be astonished by the bravery of our police and our courts. Cheer at the punishments meted out to those opposers of our totally democratic government.” History of the Road, 1st Edition, 2022