[E91 Dude]

"Me fail English? That's unpossible!" - Ralph Wiggum

"My dick is so big, they make movie popcorn in four sizes now: small, medium, large, and my dick." - Drew Carey

"I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore ... Unless you want to, you know." - Classic Iron Mike Tyson

"It's so good. Don't even try it once." - Intravenous heroin user, cocaine.org

"All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us... they can't get away this time." - Lieutenant General Lewis B. "Chesty" Puller (when surrounded by 8 enemy divisions)

What are some of yours?

[just4kickz]

haha dunno mine are really subjective... "you'd have to be there"

[Ray]

Originally Posted by E91 Dude

"Me fail English? That's unpossible!" - Ralph Wiggum

I love The Simpsons and Ralph has my vote for best TV character ever!

Ralph:
"Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"
"...it taste like burning."

Homer:
"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
"Here's to alcohol, the cause of—and solution to—all life's problems."

Combo:
Homer: There's your giraffe, little girl.
Ralph: I'm a boy.
Homer: That's the spirit. Never give up.

[Driv3r]

i am always tan, so i have the nickname "BrownTown" . and with that name my quote is from UPS..."What can brown do for you?"

[///Matt]

Handsome Rob: "listen, I'm gonna need your shirt, and your truck"
The Napster, as Cable Girl: "ok, sure, hee hee! Would you like my virginity too?"
HR: "If it's on the menu. You're not too bright, are you?"
TN: "Nope!"
HR: "Perfect."


Or, of course, the perfect standby:

The Black Knight
"It's just a flesh wound!"

[Ray]

I once read a poster in a bathroom of a retailer, which stated:

There are three types of people in the work force:

1. Those that watch things happen
2. Those that make things happen
3. Those that ask, 'What happened?'

Which one are you?

[just4kickz]

Originally Posted by ///Matt

Handsome Rob: "listen, I'm gonna need your shirt, and your truck"
The Napster, as Cable Girl: "ok, sure, hee hee! Would you like my virginity too?"
HR: "If it's on the menu. You're not too bright, are you?"
TN: "Nope!"
HR: "Perfect."


Or, of course, the perfect standby:

The Black Knight
"It's just a flesh wound!"

the italian job! excellent movie. made me appreciate minis.

[myfirstbimmer]

"Revenge is a meal best served cold" - From the moive "Man on Fire"

[ska///235i]

"George W Bush dont care about black people" - Kanye West

[Ray]

Originally Posted by ska

"George W Bush dont care about black people" - Kanye West

Mike Meyers' reaction was timeless!

[E91 Dude]

"If a cop smells beer on your breath, you are going to get a breathalyzer. If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you are going to get a high five." - Beer vs. Vagina, reallyweirdstuff.com

“He could have called me gay, he could have called me ugly, he could have said a lot of things and I wouldn’t have minded, but he called me short-and I am short-so I got mad and wanted to make him pay!” - Renzo Gracie

"My favorite fighter is Phil Baroni, and I'm pretty sure it's yours too." - Phil Baroni

[Josh49]

If a man talks dirty to a woman, it's called sexual harassment. If a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $5.99 a minute...

[flush01]

Originally Posted by Josh49

If a man talks dirty to a woman, it's called sexual harassment. If a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $5.99 a minute...

hahah

[findtom]

"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose
face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who
errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms,
the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the
best, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if
he fails at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall
never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor
defeat."

- Theodore Roosevelt

oh, and...

"no tickee, no laundry" from the movie The Departed

[Ray]

"...in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes." -Benjamin Franklin

[Schweitzer]

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost

[just4kickz]

The grass is always greener on the other side.

While poor men are sleeping, great men are awake making things happen

[NaTuReB0Y]

"Nacho cheese......nacho cheese....."

[wish1]

The only thing that beats hard work is talent and hard work.
Georges St-Pierre

The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
Oscar Wilde

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
Aesop

What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive?
Irv Kupcinet

We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.
Martin Luther King Jr.

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people.
Eleanor Roosevelt

Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth.
Franklin D. Roosevelt

I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.
Abraham Lincoln

Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.
Thomas Jefferson

All great things are simple, and many can be expressed in single words: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Sir Winston Churchill

Man, alone, has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man, alone, can dream and make his dreams come true.
Napoleon Hill

Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.
Warren Buffett

If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.
Jacques Anatole Thibault

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.
Chinese Proverb

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace! Where there is hatred let me sow love; Where there is injury, pardon; Where there is doubt, faith; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; Where there is sadness, joy.
Saint Francis of Assisi

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
Woody Allen

When in doubt, tell the truth.
Mark Twain

How many observe Christ's birthday! How few, his precepts! O! 'tis easier to keep Holidays than Commandments.
Benjamin Franklin

Truth is truth To the end of reckoning.
William Shakespeare

The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men prefer not to hear.
Herbert Agar

I am the way, the truth and the life, no man comes to the Father but by me.
Jesus Christ, John 14:6

[dmontic71]

"Man who fart in church, sits in own pu" - Confusious

[Gripster]

Never argue with an idiot. They just drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. - anon

[aapriadi]

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself” - Unknown